Index: Disagreeing Appropriately

“But what if they just keep talking back and are driving me crazy,” a mother asked me while I was instructing a group of parents on how to teach their children to accept “no” answers.The mother of three told the group she knew she needed help becausesometimes she feels so crazy, or out of control, when she’s around her children… Read more »

When I was a little girl, my brothers used to tease me. Every time I was teased or called names by them, I allowed myself to become emotional. One day when I was upset, my father said to me, “Nicholeen, if you don’t let the teasing work, then it won’t be fun for them and they’ll stop teasing. You have… Read more »

As nice as it would be to have complete control over outcomes, it isn’t humanly possible. Cause and effect is a principle of life that we can usually rely upon, but sometimes there seems to be another will for our days and experiences that turns our plans upside down. Sometimes these unexpected turns can create a domino-effect of unfortunate events,… Read more »

I recently asked a group of 10-year-old children what kinds of negative consequences their families have. “At our house, we sweep the floor and clean,” said one boy. “Mom gets mad and goes into a bad mood,” said another boy. “Mom used to send us to time out, but we don’t do that anymore,” said a thoughtful girl. I asked… Read more »

As I rounded the corner of a shopping isle at a local grocery store, I heard crying. Through tears a young girl, about 8 years old, said, “Tell me what it is Mom. Tell me what this is.” The moment I turned into this isle, the mother was in the middle of yelling, “Shut up right now or you’ll be… Read more »

Family travel looks different these days than it used to. Today’s parents were raised in a slower time. Most families planned one or two trips a year, which were usually taken during school holidays, and in our case, in the family travel trailer. While there are still families that really don’t like to leave home for even one night (even… Read more »

Self-government is being able to determine the cause and effect of any given situation and possessing a knowledge of your own behaviors so that you can control them. This means that each person decides what type of person they ought to be and plans for how to become this person. When, as it always does, the person falls off the… Read more »

“My 2yo has started crying a LOT the past few days. Over every little thing. Nothing is different physically or environmentally that I can tell. He already has his 2yo molars, too.. He’s just been crying about everything that he doesn’t like, with some pretty good tantrums thrown in the mix of the average crying. I tried holding him in… Read more »

When I see my children are getting frustrated, I gently remind them that they can disagree appropriately. I even tell my children exactly how to disagree with ME sometimes. The point of the skill is to learn how to stop emotion and problem solve instead of get upset, and to learn when it’s a good time to appropriately disagree.… Read more »

When people don’t speak the same language, it’s hard to understand each other. Likewise, when parents and children don’t speak the same language, then they can become disconnected because of lack of understanding. Understanding creates a feeling of respect and bonding in relationships and is a vital component to creating family unity and solving family problems. Are parents and children… Read more »

Christmas stories are the best! They really have a way of teaching our hearts about the true meaning of Christmas, when the to-do lists seem to take over the month of December. Even though many of the best Christmas stories involve someone giving a gift, the stories aren’t really about giving. They are about something much deeper; sacrifice. Think of… Read more »

Diplomacy is dying. MSN’s Feb 18, 2022 article called, “Is This The Year Of The Angry Parent? The GOP Hopes So,” talked about how parent anger about masks and social issues was helping the GOP and causing a problem. Yahoo News declared, “A parents’ revolt is currently sweeping the nation,” in their Feb 18, 2022 article titled, “Democrats’ Worst Nightmare… Read more »